Solo travel and the book

When I turned 49, I decided it was time to gift myself a trip to Hawaii.

At that point, I’ve been a “divorced woman,” “single mom,” and “household head” for a while. I was used to being “solo” at home. I have been traveling around the globe by myself on business trips. I liked the freedom of traveling alone. I have traveled on vacations with only the kids to new places across different countries for many years now and enjoyed it. I never felt out of place because I was not with a man by my side.

Still, until the age of 49, I have never traveled solo for pleasure. 

--

I love Honolulu. The hotel has a lovely terrace restaurant next to the pool. I put on the turquoise dress I bought in Greece a few years ago and took my book.

-          A table for how many, mam?

-          Table for one. 

     I smile. I feel so free and happy.  

-          Just for one?

     The young hostess looks confused.

-          Yes, just for myself.

-          Okay, don’t worry, I will find you a good one.

I was not worried. Should I have been?

She takes me to a table somehow in the corner with a splendid view. Gets the sit for me.

-          Here, she says. We will take good care of you.

     This is nice. I have never had such a kind hostess. But somehow, she acts like she is taking care of an invalid. Or am  I imagining it?  

-          What would you like to order? A cocktail or a glass of wine to start?

     Ok, it starts to feel normal.

-          A glass of Pinot Gris, please.

I relax on the chair and start to look around. The restaurant is not very busy yet. Some couples and families with kids. A pleasant atmosphere. Soon will be sunset, and I will have a perfect view from my table to enjoy. I am not taking my book out yet.

    In just a quick moment, the waitress comes with the Pinot Gris. Wow, this is fast service!

-          Here is your wine, mam.  

    The waitress is closer to my age. She smiles. I smile back.

 -          Are you all right, mam? Is there something we can do for you to help you be comfortable?

It’s my turn to be confused. I am very comfortable. Don’t I look relaxed?

 -          I am just fine, thank you for asking. I can order now.

When she comes over with the food, the feeling that there is something I don’t quite understand becomes stronger. She puts her hand on my shoulder. I’m getting uneasy.

-          If there is anything we can do for you, anything at all, just let me know. I’ll be coming to check on you often.

-          Thank you, you are very kind indeed. I am perfectly fine; it is a wonderful evening, and the food looks delicious.

As she leaves, I open my book on the table. I can see her looking back at me. She notices my book, smiles back, and nods approvingly.

I figured it out by the end of the trip. A single woman (my age??) having dinner in a restaurant in Hawaii is unusual. With the book by my side, I became socially acceptable.

Back in Seattle, I’m still wondering if I somehow missed the clues all these years. I chose an Italian restaurant close to home to go out for dinner. Nobody cared if I had a book or not. Thank God!